There was a one-eighty somewhere between this week and last week regarding my idea for my final self-portrait project. Originally, I uploaded two multiple exposure photographs of myself with the intention of creating a series about having an ‘identity crisis.’ The plan was to take these photos of myself, then manipulate them to encapsulate themes of depression and anxiety; something we all struggle with, while also something many of us do not often look in the eyes of. Did I like this idea? Of course, I specialize in creating sad photographs. Except this time, there was something in my head telling me that creating this was going to bore me, and that I was not going to be excited, or proud, of what I ended up presenting for my final.
Two days before the project is due, I have decided to explore the sculpture route. Heavily inspired by Cindy Sherman and her take on malleability, my final decision was to create myself out of clay because the medium itself is pliable. Therefore, I oversee molding my own identity. In an article written by Phoebe Hoban, she includes some words regarding Sherman from curator Eva Respini, "'Now we all take it for granted that a photograph can be Photoshopped. We live in the era of YouTube fame and reality-TV shows and makeovers, where you can be anything you want to be any minute of the day, and artists are responding to that. Cindy was one of the first to explore the idea of the malleability or fluidity of identity.'" Sherman continuously transformed herself through each of her works. This made room for plenty of self-expression and growth throughout the decades of her career. As artists, the personal manipulation of our visual identity translates into the people that we are. Constantly growing, learning, changing; the clothes I wear, the color of my hair. “Nobody’s here but me,” Sherman claims. At the end of the day, it is all on us to be the people we want to be.
I Shall Grow and Grow is a ceramic self-portrait appendaged with wefts of the magenta-colored hair extensions I wear and adorned with low-quality nose jewelry purchased on Amazon, mimicking my own curation. The stoneware vessel has been hand-thrown using the pottery wheel, while the face has been built on the surface post entering its early leather-hard stages. In its final form, the piece remains resting sealed in this leather-hard stage, intentionally never entering the bisque firing process. The reason for keeping the clay in this state is because this piece is meant to continuously be altered as my life goes on and as my identity blossoms. The clay can keep being manipulated through each change I go through; I can take away from it or add onto it. I can give myself a nose-job if I ever decide to get a real one, or some lip-filler. "And by limiting her subject matter strictly to herself, while at the same time excavating countless permutations, she inspired a generation of younger artists to explore their own identities across a range of mediums,” states Hoban. Influenced by Sherman, and as a young artist, this is exactly what I am doing; merely exploring myself using the medium I know best.
Works Cited
Hoban, Phoebe. “The Cindy Sherman Effect.” ARTnews.Com, ARTnews.com, 18 Nov. 2019, www.artnews.com/art-news/news/the-cindy-sherman-effect-505/.
Sehgal, Parul. “The Ugly Beauty of Cindy Sherman’s Instagram Selfies.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 5 Oct. 2018, www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/10/05/magazine/instagram-cindy-sherman-ugly-beauty.html.
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